Day eight was my first day back to work after vacation. On weekdays, I get up at 5 am and write in my journal for an hour. Then I work at home (usually writing, not always) until 9ish. A quick shower, pack some food, and I drive into the office. Most days, I don’t leave the office until after 6. Last night, it was 6:30.
I arrived home at 6:45 — time to do yoga. Did I do yoga? No. I cuddled with my partner, trying not to cry and instead, to let go of a difficult day. We made dinner together because when I get home at 6:45, I’m starving. After dinner, I fell asleep on the couch while reading a book. 8:45 and the day is over. Also, I never took my supplements.
Not surprisingly, I did not want to write this post! If I don’t admit it, I can pretend it didn’t happen. I actually considered, for a moment, saying that I did yoga on my living room floor. But, I didn’t. And writing is nothing if it isn’t truth telling. So here I am, telling the truth.
As predicted, the hardest part of my 40 day challenge is letting go of yoga as another TODO on my already insanely long TODO list and “come home” to myself. I have so little time in the evening, I “come home” by connecting with my partner and hate to give that up. But my body is my priority this month. Taking care of myself is how I let go and become available for intimate connection. So, I will keep showing up.
Tonight, I have a massage appointment. Yeah! I have posted “No Meetings” on my calendar so that I have time to do some yoga before my appointment. Wish me luck, here I go …